First, condolences for your loss. It sounds like you were a great couple.

I fully agree with you. Every long-lasting couple interviewed says the same: it's about accepting each other and nurturing each other's needs. The key is not perfection, but acceptance and loving effort.

Alas, it looks like most people seeks "ready-made" solutions and rejects effort in relationships. They think love "just happens". I blame our romantic culture and its delusions.