> "There is some strange idea that sex is somehow uniquely different from all other ways of expressing love, and you should only have sex if you feel a priori arousal and anything else is somehow non-consensual."

Yes, there is, and thank feminism for that. Because for most feminism women's needs are paramount and men's needs are irrelevant. Therefore, a husband should always be available for her emotional needs, but a wife should only be sexual when she fancies it. In other words, it's all about her (look at most women's comments on Medium if you don't believe me).