This is absolutely important and right, BUT there's a big caveat: is she willing to question herself and accept uncomfortable truths?

Because if she isn't, your advice would NOT work. It will make things worse. It will create havoc.

1. Some people are willing to question themselves, and grow together.

2. Other people just want to be reassured and "feel OK" - no matter what.

Being truthful and "bring it up" issues will only stress and enrage the second type. Even if you do it in the most kind and tactful way. They hate the truth, because the truth hurts them.

(of course this applies to both men and women)

Just because something works for you, never assume it will be working for everybody else. We're not all alike. :-)